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Empowering South Asian women to overcome domestic violence and become self-reliant.

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Now providing guidance to all South Asian seniors and caregivers in the DC Metro area.

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Home > THAPPAD, a film in 21 slaps

THAPPAD, a film in 21 slaps

In this video, the woman sums up what made her realize that she was a victim of relentless abuse in normal everyday circumstances.

If you have experienced similar derogatory behavior continuously from your partner, chances are you are being mentally and psychologically abused, leading to loss of self-esteem and confidence.

 

 

Translation

Slap 1. You're so dumb, I've married you so I tolerate you, be grateful

Slap 2. My wife is a good cook, that's her one expertise, may as well appreciate this!

Slap 3. The meaning of a marriage is sexual relationship, if you weren't interested in sex why did you get married? why have you ruined my life?

Slap 4. I'm taking care of all your needs, why don't you take some responsibility?

Slap 5. Can I get a cup of tea? Will your 'feminism' allow you to do that for me?

Slap 6. If you were even a bit capable you'd be earning at least half of what I do...

Slap 7. Why should I have checked with you? Do you even know the 'I' of Investment?

Slap 8. Shall I beg you for sex? Do you want to charge for it now?

Slap 9. Oh yeah I know about your feminism. If you were a feminist you wouldn't be attracted to my six figure salary

Slap 10. You're rearing two children, that's it, not slogging as the head of a business empire

Slap 11. You make such a song and dance about periods, anything I say makes you cry. Be strong!

Slap 12. Family responsibility or offsite job...you yourself should have the sense to see what is important

Slap 13.  Beta, don't take your mother to the Parent-Teacher Meeting. She'll ask her usual stupid questions and you'll get it from your teacher!

Slap 14. Look at yourself, a mother of one child but you look like you've given birth to five! Don't blame me if I get into an affair.

Slap 15. Forget talking about your home all the time, your in-laws home is your home now.

Slap 16. Oh so now your salary's increased, you think I'm your servant?

Slap 17. One more promotion? I hope your boss is not getting lucky...!

Slap 18. How embarrassing you look in your shorts! Accept your age and your shape.

Slap 19. If you can't take the pressure why don't you leave the job? Anyway I earn enough for both of us.

Slap 20. You had so much fun with your boyfriends that you lost interest in sex after marriage?

Slap 21. My mum was at least a good homemaker. You're just average, at office and at home.

 

A slap is not just what is delivered to your face

A slap is each and every word that damages your self-esteem

A slap is not just the hand that is lifted against you

A slap is the toxic mentality that demolishes you at will

 

'THAPPAD'  was not just about that one slap

It was a relationship
A trust
A togetherness
that ended  for me

because of the patriarchy and gender discrimination

shown in those 21 slaps

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